M: Ichabod’s theory is the demons are using Mama Mills to drive people down the same path they forced her to take. But Abbie’s like ‘Why 15 years later?’
T: Valid point, Ms. Mills.
M: This discourse is interrupted by the entrance of one Hawley Q. Hawleyman, bringing with him requested items of books, maps, and matzoh ball soup.
T: When were they request—matzoh ball soup? WHAT Oh man, does Hawley’s Mom make a cameo?
M: That would be awesome. No, this is a deli special.
T: Eh, well, still – he brought *soup*! To Crane? Awwww sleepy bromance
M: Although Bella’s also made a very solid bowl of soup…
T: You just will not let this go.
M: I WILL NOT! Those donuts were too good…
T: It’s okay. You’re distracted by Hawley’s not-mom’s soup.
M: It did look very good. And Ichabod slips and almost compliments the privateer.
T: Is Hawley really caring for Ichabod, or trying to get in good with the Mill he likes this week?
M: Good question!
T: I’m SO glad they didn’t name him Boone.
M: Bad memories of Lost? So the two discover that the other is a fan of Jane Austen, and neither would have pegged the other for that.
T: Nope: http://www.millsandboon.co.uk/1 Uh – we KNEW Hawley was an Austen fan. He called Ichabod ‘Pride and Prejudice’ a few episodes ago!!
M: Did Abbie hear it? Also, that just means he’s seen the movie.
T: Or did he say it to Ichabod, I don’t remember. ANYWAY *we* knew it.
M: Hawley’s definitly using this as a flirt technique, Abbie’s not going anywhere in particular with her responses.
T: “Oh, Ms. Austen! I have devoured her catalogue! Let us talk over the themes in her masterpiece, Northanger Abbey!”
M: Maybe some period costumes – turns out Abbie was all jealous of Katrina’s wardrobe.
T: Oh WOW. That… was unexpected.
M: Also a quip by me, not what happened.
T: Oh darn.
M: You need to stop reading Mills and Boone.
T: They have far too many cowboy titles. I couldn’t even find the historical American ones. Moving on.
M: Ichabod’s nodding off due to the drugs Hawley put in his soup, since Abbie had asked for something that would help him fall asleep. H and A giggle over this, and we cut to the Manor!
T: Goodie, roofieing colleagues is now a thing.
M: Henry and Katrina (still in jeans and corset) are standing over a normal human baby, but when she picks the child up to mother it or something, we see this eeeeeeevil baby with horns that’s been dipped in black paint kinda thing.
T: Yeah, it was a squashed hornless baby before – Polanski hadn’t gotten to it.
M: I thought it was a cool effect – very evil baby.
T: And Henry’s all “heh heh I tricked her”?
M: He’s smiling, yes. When it touches her shoulder she starts getting infected or whatever2 – but doesn’t notice it right away. Back at TPI, the sisters and Hawley are bickering over a plan while watching security footage. They spot the patient from the start of the episode smashing a mirror and intending to kill himself. So they rush in and stop him.
T: Mills to the rescue!
M: Well, Hawley does the tackling.
T: Oh go Hawley… brawny Hawley.
M: And Abbie sees Mama Mills flicker into the room.
T: Um. Okay.
M: Causing her to gasp in surprise –
T: Gasping = drama.
M: …and then both Mama and Abbie… flicker out of existence. Commercials!
T: WAIT. Breathing = disappearing? No wonder Katrina’s short-lunged.
M: Now you know why Katrina doesn’t do it. Damnit!