This week’s Lindsay on Own made me want to pierce my ear with a knife, and then someone did!
This week’s Lindsay on Own made me want to pierce my ear with a knife, and then someone did! Not my ear, but their own- Ok, here goes nothing…
Ladies, Gentlemen, Fans of Mean Girls hoping for the sequel, it’s never going to happen. It’s particularly never going to happen when the film’s star doesn’t realize that showing up late and cancelling on any and everyone is bad for business. She doesn’t realize that your friends are not those people doing the one thing you can’t do, in front of you. Nor does she realize that she’s no longer the little girl in The Parent Trap with all of the potential in the world. Scratch that, she could still have potential, but that would involve being on time.
As you’ll remember from last week, she no longer has her life coach or her sobriety mentor so she’s truly on her own, except for her trusty assistant Matt who always looks like he has a foot out of the door. Nonetheless, she has booked a shoot with Elle Magazine – Indonesia. Super exciting to have photos in a magazine that weren’t taken by the paparazzi. Not to Lindsay. These people have taken a two-day journey around the world for this shoot and she’s late. Very late. So late that they lose natural light and have to postpone once she does show up. But Lindsay’s unaffected and agrees to shoot the next day, when she also shows up late, they lose light, rinse and repeat. Finally the shoot has to happen at her apartment (they’ve also lost their location), with her clothes (the original designer wanted their clothes back), and Lilo has the nerve to tell us that she should get a stylist credit for most of her shoots. No Linds, a stylist was paid for the shoot, that was supposed to happen yesterday. In the rush and rumble of her apartment-turned-photo-studio, Lindsay’s friends arrive.
These friends are from Russia, and they drink, a lot. And of course, they serve as the perfect distraction for the girl who is easily distracted. Even the Elle producer explains that she has a daughter and would like to tell her you can do anything you want in the world, but you have to show up and be professional or it’s not going to work. Clearly Dina Lohan didn’t have that talk with her daughter. Finally the shoot is over, or just ended because the crew had to make the two-day trip back to their home base after spending a fortune in overtime to get the shots they need.
Free from work constraints, Linds decided to hit the town with her homies and explains that she’s fine being around her friends who drink and can totally handle going to a club. She says she’s very social, she’ll dance a lot and be in and out of the club smoking and talking to different people, to me that sounds like a good, drunken, night out. Back at her home, Lindsay and her friends are hanging out, drinking, playing -well-drinking games and one of them has the bright idea to allow his ear to be pierced with a knife. It looks like it hurts. It hurts to watch.
Next week: The “Series” Finale. Yes, already and yes it’s a train wreck that I don’t want to stop, and certainly don’t want to stop watching.